Let me tell you about 2015.

Happy almost New Year to you!  Yesterday, my mom read something off of Facebook along the lines of “The week between Christmas and New Year’s I don’t know what time of day it is, who I am, or what I’m supposed to be doing” and that is pretty spot on. It feels great to be home after a long three weeks wrapping up the semester, and a wonderful but stupendously busy week visiting family and celebrating Christmas in Kentucky – but to be honest, after all of that, I really don’t have a clue what day it is anymore, my sleep schedule is all out of whack, and I just finished reading the last Harry Potter book in like 24 hours just because I could.

It’s not all unproductive fun though, I promise!  This week I finished up the journal I’ve kept all semester.  I like measuring spans of time in terms of my journals – it’s interesting to see how quick I fill one up, what went down in my life during that time, and how I look back on it later.  Since I started this journal at the very beginning of the fall semester and finally filled it up Sunday evening, it’s covered a lot of ground with me – essentially a third of my year.

That realization, coupled with the impending holiday, prompted me to look back on my year as a whole.  And just like I appreciate the way I can use my journals as a lens to look back at the past, I love the way music describes the details of my life.  I love the way lyrics put into words how I’m feeling better than I ever could, and I love the way I get to know music based on what God’s doing in my life and in my heart.

I’ve learned a lot this year, about who I am as a person, what I want out of life, and best of all, who and how I am in the world as a daughter of God and what He wants out of my life – plans to prosper me and not to harm me, plans for my good and His glory.  I’ve learned that my story is not THE story. So instead of sharing stories with this blog post, I want to share songs – the ones that charted the course of my year.

Here are my top 10 songs of 2015.

1 – Avril 14th by Aphex Twin

2 – Past Lives by BORNS

Past lives couldn’t ever hold me down
Lost love is sweeter when it’s finally found
I’ve got the strangest feeling
This isn’t our first time around
This is my fight song
Take back my life song
Prove I’m alright song
My power’s turned on
Starting right now I’ll be strong
I’ll play my fight song
And I don’t really care if nobody else believes
‘Cause I’ve still got a lot of fight left in me
You’re just getting over him
Your eyes are shining, but oh so dim
I heard he tore you apart limb from limb
You promise it wasn’t the worst
And I hope there’s enough for you
Cause my love is bleeding and slightly bruised

How many lives have we led?
Tonight I’m gonna dance for all that we’ve been through.
But I don’t wanna dance if I’m not dancing with you.
Tonight I’m gonna dance like you were in this room.
But I don’t wanna dance if I’m not dancing with you
God, I run into Your arms
Unashamed because of mercy
I’m overwhelmed, I’m overwhelmed by You

I know the power of Your Cross
Forgiven and free forever You’ll be my God
All that You’ve done is so overwhelming
And maybe I’m crazy for claiming my freedom
For loving and leaving, I secretly hear them
It could be so simple, I’ve broken the thimble
Equipped with a map and a guide to decide
All I know is that I’ve got to run away
Still I get hard pressed on every side
Between the rock and a compromise
Like the truth and pack of lies fightin’ for my soul
And I’ve got no place left go
Cause I got changed by what I’ve been shown
More glory than the world has known
Keeps me ramblin’ on
You get what you give and you gave me a lifeline

Easy doesn’t mean it’s love
Difficult doesn’t mean to give up
Easy doesn’t make it true
It’s hard enough without you
I lose my balance on these eggshells you tell me to tread
I’d rather be a wild one instead
Don’t wanna hang around the in crowd, the cool kids
I’m cool to me, cause they’re not cooler than we are

So hey, we brought our drum and this is how we dance
We have no apologies for being…

Find me where the wild things are
UndergradAllie KayComment